The Disfigurement of True Love

“We love Him because He first loved us.”
- 1 John 4:19

“When they tried to detach the skeleton which he held in his embrace, he fell to dust.” These are the last words spoken of Quasimodo in the novel by Victor Hugo, The Hunchback of Notre-Dame (1831). A novel that depicts a disfigured man of integrity in love with Esmerelda (a gypsy with a kind heart), and Archdeacon Claude Frollo (a vile man of the cloth). Frollo, obsessed with Esmerelda and being unable to acquire her, has her hung. Quasimodo eventually gains retribution by throwing Frollo from the tower of Notre-Dame. Then, crawls down into the crypt where Esmerelda’s body lays. He embraces her and dies; unwilling to let her go.

It is a story truly worthy of its fame. More importantly, it is a sentiment on a fact shared by St. Francis de Sales, “We cannot help conforming ourselves to what we love.”

The name ‘Quasimodo’ literally means ‘half-formed man’. What could be more true of all of us today. Half-formed, ever-seeking, never-knowing and bumbling about to find our way. Ever susceptible to the slightest note of kindness to fill the need of being loved. What a dangerous place to find ourselves. For truly, we conform ourselves to what we love. And, if we are not careful, what we love can disfigure us to the point of meaningless dust. What is it that we love?

1 John 4:19 tells us, “We love Him because He first loved us.” Like, but very unlike, Quasimodo, Jesus loved us first. He loved us so much He embraced our mortality. He was born among us as a man. He embraced all the trouble, heartache, struggles, hunger, want, temptation and desire we face. Yet, unlike us, He was not ‘half-formed’. He was sinless in the embracing of life.

He came to earth. Lived as a man like any other man. Embraced everything we face and more. He was beaten, scourged, mocked and crucified. However, instead of embracing His love (YOU) only to be turned to dust, He was resurrected. He brought new life. Available to all. A free gift of grace.

All that is required is that we embrace Him in return. He loved us first and conformed to our likeness to save us. Now, it is up to us to love Him. And thus, be conformed to His likeness. If you struggle to love God, you simply do not know how much God loves you.

Contrary to popular belief, we really don’t have a ‘sin problem’ in the world. We have a love problem. We love everything from sex to ice cream, money to antiques, fame to acknowledgment in our own house. We love and yet, know not what love is.

True love is found in Christ. To find that love is to conform to it. “…because as He is, so are we in this world.” (1 John 4:17) However, it is not “a” love; it is “the” love. We cannot be conformed to a partial love. It cannot be one of many. It is only what we truly love unto which we are conformed.

Are you still walking the world as Quasimodo (half-formed)? Ask yourself what you truly love. Be honest. God is big enough to handle it. He is also loving enough to overcome it. Then, set your heart anew. Focus on His love towards you. We love because He first loved us.

And when we discover His love for us, we are conformed to it. And… “There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves torment. But he who fears has not been made perfect in love. We loved Him because He first loved us.” (1 John 4:18-19)

Be loved today! Be love today!

© 2026 Warren Martin. All rights Reserved.