Thanks Giving or Judgment Giving?

“Who are you to judge another’s servant? To his own master he stands or falls. Indeed, he will be made to stand, for God is able to make him stand.”
— Romans 14:4

Family. There is much wrapped up in the word. As we head this week into Thanksgiving, many will be contemplating all that word entails. I hope and pray you have a wonderful family and enjoy a blessed time together. Yet, many dread the very notion of spending time with family, or at least some of the family—especially that crazy Uncle Warren.

I want to take a moment and pause and consider how judgment comes into this scenario. We all know the history of our family. Who did what. Whose hurt who. Whose unreasonable. Whose abrasive. And we all know how the same old story ends for the hundredth time. With all we know about our family’s history, it is far too easy to pass judgment without much thought.

However, we are warned in the Bible not to judge. Several times, we are told not to pass judgment on others. Romans 14:4 poses the question, “Who are you to judge another’s servant?”

So are we supposed to just ignore history. No! We are to have discernment. In the Christian context, discernment is defined as a “perception in the absence of judgment with a view to obtaining spiritual guidance and understanding.” As 1 Thessalonians 5:21 states, “Test all things; hold fast what is good.”

We are to be wise. We have to protect ourselves and our family by holding fast to what is good for them. This means evaluating which situations we should be in and which we should not. It also means seeing things as they are, not as they used to be.

So, how does this differ from judgment? Judgment is final. Judgment is the conclusion of the trial when the sentence begins. Judgment leaves no room for people to change. It is the concrete shoes on the feet of a relationship dropped to the bottom of a lake.

Yet, God is the business of changing lives. As our verse today continues, “Who are you to judge another’s servant? To his own master he stands or falls. Indeed, he will be made to stand, for God is able to make him stand.” (Romans 14:4) God is able to change the hardest heart. He is able to redeem the lost, raise the dead, heal the brokenhearted, heal the addict, bring joy to the depressed, calm the angry and much, much more. He is life change.

Discernment keeps the door open for change. It neither joins the world in misery nor tears down necessary boundaries. Yet, it allows for change. It hopes for it. It prays for it. It extends the hand of peace.

For many of us, there is one family member we pass judgment on more than any other: ourselves. We can be brutal to the person in the mirror. However, YOU are “another’s servant”: God’s servant. You have no right to even judge yourself! (See 1 Corinthians 4:3-4) Today, are you walking in judgment? Or discernment? Are you open to change? God is able to make you stand!

Here’s some common desires we struggle to find satisfaction for either in ourselves or our family, but in Christ they are satisfied every day. Give thanks that:

You are loved: Jesus said, “As the Father loved Me, I also have loved you; abide in my love.” (John 15:9)

You are accepted: “To the praise of the glory of His grace, by which He made you accepted in the Beloved.” (Ephesians 1:6)

You are forgiven: “And you, being dead in your trespasses and the uncircumcision of your flesh, He has made alive together with Him, having forgiven you all trespasses…” (Colossians 2:13)

You have everything you need for life and godliness: “His divine power has given to us all things that pertain to life and godliness, through the knowledge of Him who called us by glory and virtue.” (2 Peter 1:3)

You are a new creation: “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold all things have become new. Now all things are of God, who has reconciled us to Himself through Jesus Christ, and has given us the ministry of reconciliation.”(2 Corinthians 5:17-18)

You are a new creation! God changed you spiritually and wants to work the change out in your life. Which includes your relationships. He longs to work through you as a minister of reconciliation.

I’m challenged this week not to walk in judgment, but in discernment. Finding my desires satisfied in Christ, I’m challenged to leave open the door of hope. To expect change. Change in myself, as I set my eyes on who God says I am. And change in my relationships, by growing as a minister of reconciliation. Real and meaningful change begins with giving thanks for what Christ has done, and ends in earnest expectation that He will bring it to completion!

© 2025 Warren Martin. All rights Reserved.